Saturday, September 20, 2014

It's Not Goodbye!

It's been a few months since I've posted last.  And I think it's about time I tell you why.  I have really been struggling with a few things  First, as you know my husband had lost his job last year...right before baby #2 was to be born.  We made it through (and he has another job now) but the debt we accrued during his unemployment was way more than we could afford with his new pay.  So we decided to sell our house and use whatever we gained to pay off the debt and start anew.  The other thing I have been going through is just purely emotional.  I don't know if it's post pardum or just genuine depression but I have been pretty down this summer.

So in order to "get my life back" I decided to focus on what is most important in life...my kids and my health.  I don't have any family nearby that can help me with my children so it's me who takes them to soccer practice, to the doctor appointments, to playdates, etc.  It's me who makes sure homework is done, exercise is had and food is in their belly.  To do this and be a full-time working woman is seriously hard!  How the other bloggers out there do this effortlessly is purely amazing to me.  I also have been feeling in the last few months that it is MY example that is the most important.  I need to make sure I am teaching them how to grow up into a good man, one that any woman would want for a husband!  And I need to focus on teaching them the principles of our religion, which is important to me.

To rule out depression I am going to work on losing weight and being a better example for my kids. When my first child became mobile I had the same feelings so I wondered if this is possibly a late onset of post pardum.  Those of you who are mothers, you understand this.  When your child becomes mobile...any sense of your freedom is gone for the next couple of years while you chase your child ensuring he's safe!  I do give #2 a bit more freedom than I did with #1 but still don't want any harm to come to him.  So it's a constant vigilance and a constant inability to complete any one task that makes me feel "lost" (for lack of a better word).

So for these 2 reasons...becoming healthier (in mind and body) and focusing on raising my boys... I have decided to take a little break from the blog.  I won't be gone forever because I love sharing,  creating and this whole online community! It keeps me excited about teaching and that is something I LOVE!   Good luck to all of you in teaching and to those of you working on your national boards!  I hope we all get good news in November!